A story about survival, grenades, jean shorts, and abs.Listen in as me and my guest and fellow podcaster, Cam, zip up our jorts, sharpen our boobytrap spikes, and hunt down this film's sauce rating.Written and directed by David A. Prior (Deadliest Prey, Killzone, Jungle Assault), TV Guide called the film "a wretched Rambo ripoff," while Morning Movie Review said "Holy cow[, t]his movie is a good time." Welp, if that ain't a ringing endorsement, I dunno what is.It tells the story of Mike Danton (play by March 1984 Playgirl Man of the Month Ted Prior) who get's kidnapped by a band of mercenaries who "train" for some oblique mission by hunting civilians running for their lives. The leader of these mercs is Colonel John Hogan (played by David Campbell) who himself is at the mercy of a suited mystery man named Michaelson (played by veteran actor Troy Donahue). These mercs are training for a mission that is never explained and they all seem to be rather incompetent. Their general lack of ability will be their death knell when Danton gets free and starts picking them off one-by-one. There are oodles of shitty explosions, excessive gun cocking, and consistently bad hand-to-hand combat techniques. This movie is a rollicking good time in the trash cinema genre!The film is currently available on Amazon Prime.Check out Cam's podcast, it's a fun time! Jacked Up Review Show Podcast

A story about incredibly short-shorts, kids being assholes, seemingly accepted pedophilic tendencies, and poor Mozart.Listen in as me and returning guest and horror cinephile, Sean, pull on those aforementioned '80s short-shorts, roast some s'mores, and chat about this subversive classic.Written and directed by Robert Hiltzik (Sleepaway Camp, Return to Sleepaway Camp), IGN called the film a "super fun, crazy and [...] an incredibly memorable movie," while TV Guide said it was "simply irredeemable." Hey, no one reads TV Guide any more, so what do they know?!It tells the story of traumatized and shy Angela Baker (Felissa Rose, Terrifier 2, The House that Wept Blood) and her cousin Ricky (Jonathan Tiersten, Toilet Zombie Baby Strikes Back, The House that Wept Blood) as they attend summer camp. But it is not all sun, fun, and flag football, because as soon as kids begin to bully and accost Angela, they end up dead in awful ways. Behind Angela's troubled childhood and death of her father, lie a major secret that only comes to light in the film's final moments. A secret that set audiences talking for years to come.The film is currently available on DVD & Blu-Ray, Freevee, Crackle, Peacock, Plex, Tubi, Shout! Factory TV, and Amazon Prime.

A story about super powers through science, green screens, stock footage, and running in place.Listen in as me and returning guest, Chris, sit down for another choice cut recommended to me by this masochistic friend of the show.Directed by Lewis Schoenbrun (Aliens vs. Avatars, Queen Cobra) and written by Keith Schaffner (Queen Cobra, Demonoids), The Horror Times called the film "not interesting, fun, or enjoyable," while Mondo Bizzaro said "it is so terrible that it makes me laugh." Love it or hate it, you're right. This film has no in-between viewers. The only way to know which camp you land in is to watch it yourself.It tells the story of Henry "Hank" Howard (Jordan Lawson, Sunny Family Cult, The Black Prison), a young scientist toiling over the development of a super soldier serum under the supervision of asshole General Darwin (Terence Lording, The Amazing Bulk). At the same time, Hank is schtupping Darwin's daughter, Hannah (Shevaun Kastl, Criminal Minds, Heroes). After denied Hannah's hand in marriage by douchebag Darwin, Hank decides the best way to speed along results is to make himself a test subject. He injects himself with the serum and finds that when he gets angry he turns into a tornado which then turns into a variably-sized nude, purple man-beast. This purple aberration is pursued by dopey cops, the Bulk is pursuing the evil Dr. Kantlove in his Super Mario-like castle, and all the while Darwin is pulling the strings. It's a fucking mess.The film is currently available on Tubi and VUDU.Visit Chris' YouTube channel!

A story about forbidden love, casual breaking and entering, random dancing, and Dutch angles.Listen in as me and new guest, Ben, pull on our patchwork pants and overly embroidered jackets to revisit this abomination of a cinematic vehicle meant to launch Vanilla Ice into movie stardom. Luckily for society it was a spectacular failure.Directed by David Kellogg (Inspector Gadget, Lusty Liaisons II) and written by David Stenn (Girl 27, She Was Marked for Murder), the Washington Post called the film "a cross between an after-school special and MTV video," while TV Guide said the film's "premise is utterly insupportable and [Kellogg's] direction renders the choices flat." Did I watch the same movie? These reviews, though low on the Metacritic score, seem kind. This film was a dumpster fire of epic proportions, and I will die on that hill.It tells the story of a kind-of-a-jerk rapper named Johnny (Vanilla Ice) getting stuck in a small town and pursuing a local girl named Kathy (Kristin Minter, Home Alone) who is already dating a definite jerk named Nick (John Newton, Alive, Melrose Place). Ice, erm-I mean Johnny, ambles around the town chasing after the freshly-graduated from high school Kathy, while his crew deals with a kooky elderly couple who try to fix a broken motorcycle. There is random dancing, Ice rapping, a backstory involving witness protection, and a kidnapping. It's a bit of a roaming mess. Get stoned and watch this one.The film is currently available on Prime Video if you feel like burning some cash.Find and follow Ben on Instagram: @benschyan

A story about Hollywood, a man with a dream, special effects, and UNIONS.Listen in as me and new guest, Brian, travel to Tinseltown of yesteryear with this silly, impressive, and utterly fun ode/jibe at the movie business.Written and directed by Mike Jittlov (The Wizard of Speed and Time), Time Out called the film a "bizarre and wacky conglomeration of [special effects] and fantasy slapstick," and 366 Weird Movies said "there is something genuinely charming here." I have to be honest, when Brian suggested this film I thought it was going to be wretched. I have to say that I found it to be utterly delightful. Of course, my own struggles as a filmmaker certainly play a part in how I see this film. Perhaps it might be a bit more boring and annoying to non-industry people, but listen in and see what we have to say about the experience.It tells the story of filmmaker & special effects artist Mike Jittlov (played by himself) as he struggles to get his career going. He gets a chance to produce a segment for a TV program highlighting special effects. The thing he doesn't know is that the two producers have a bet going as to whether or not he'll be able to deliver the product on time. As Mike and his friends work to make their dreams come true, they find themselves beset on all sides by impossible union rules, overly zealous law enforcement, and the tax man. This movie is zany and definitely worth a watch.The film is currently available on YouTube. Yes, you read that correct. YouTube. For FREE.

A story about unitards, technology run amok, an angry ghost, and a huge liability case.Listen in as me and guest, Devon, slip on our leg warmers and pop in our jazzercise mixtape to see what's the haps with this week's flick.Directed by Michael Fischa (My Mom's a Werewolf, Crack House) and written by James Bartruff (Death Spa, What's Happening Now!) and Mitch Paradise (Death Spa, Bleacher Bums), Filmmonthly called the film "a goofy, gory, unpretentious good time," and the Lair of Filth said it "is sleazy, cheesy and bone-snappingly entertaining viewing." Yea, I agree. It's pretty silly and really fun.It tells the story of Michael Evans (William Bumiller, Species, Boat Trip) as he tries to run his sexy and popular gym, Starbodies Health Spa, while a series of mysterious injuries and deaths begin. He suspects his ex-brother-in-law, David (Merritt Butrick, Star Trek 2, Star Trek 3), and his computer system that runs the gym may be to blame. His buddy Marvin (Ken Foree, Dawn of the Dead, From Beyond) just wants to toss the ol' pigskin around and wear short-shorts. Of course, the pissed off ghost of Michael's wife, Catherine (Shari Shattuck, One Deadly Ground, Spy Hard), has her own agenda in the spa. It's goofy, violent, and just plain fun.The film is currently available on Tubi, Plex, and Prime Video.

A story about parenthood, anxiety, a strange baby, and who the hell knows.Listen in as me and new guest, Jon, stare into the magical radiator that is this film and try to divine just what is going on here.Written and directed by seminal auteur David Lynch (Blue Velvet, Mulholland Drive), Time Out called the film "a singular work of the imagination, a harrowing, heartbreaking plunge into the darkest recesses of the soul," while the New York Times said it was "a murkily pretentious shocker." Sounds like someone at the NY Times is butthurt they didn't make a weird movie that inspired countless filmmakers...It tells the story of Henry (Jack Nance, Twin Peaks, Blue Velvet) as he learns he has a premature (mutant) baby while his girlfriend/mother of his child Mary (Charlotte Stewart, Twin Peaks, Tremors) is constantly on edge. She leaves Henry to care for the child alone and he sees visions of a strange woman in his radiator. It gets much, much stranger from here.The film is currently available on HBO Max, Amazon Prime, DVD and Blu-Ray.

A "story" about old people masks, breaking shit, humping shit, and doing weird shit.Listen in as me and returning guest, Chris, struggle to find the reason for this "film's" existence.Written and directed by one time indie darling Harmony Korine (Kids, Gummo), the Los Angeles Times called the film "a perverted love letter to fans of [Korine's] brand of unstable, fringe-y terror," while the New York Post said "it's about as enervating a way to waste 78 minutes as I've ever experienced." Right on, NY Post, right on.It tells the story of nothing. There is no story. It's 4 "old" people going around breaking shit and being generally antisocial. The elderly masks worn are creepy, and only one really works well. At times it is funny, at others unsettling in its realness. Overall, it is as entertaining and enticing as getting a guided tour of one's own garage in the middle of a heat wave while the stench of something dead hangs in the air.The film is currently available on DVD. If you want to hunt it down, you can find it.

A story about loneliness, unconditional love, objectophilia, and TITANIUM.Listen in as me and fellow podcaster and returning guest, Al, dress up like crash test dummies and prepare for a head-on collision between our minds and this controversial award-winner.Written and directed by Julia Ducournau (Raw, Servant), the Playlist called the film "deliciously grisly and inventive," while the Guardian said it was "sheer silliness and towering pointlessness." Must be one of those critics that hates to read subtitles.It tells the story of car model/stripper Alexia, a daring performance from newcomer Agathe Rousselle, as she dances on a Cadillac, has sex with said Cadillac, kills people, and runs from her life. Disguising herself as a missing boy returning a decade after his disappearance, Alexia becomes Andre and goes to live with the boy's father, Vincent (Vincent Lindon, Undercover, The Measure of a Man). Vincent is a fire chief and brings "Andre" into the world of firefighting, but one fireman has suspicions about who the boy really is...The film is currently available on Hulu, Amazon Prime, DVD and Blu-Ray.

A story about a girl, her past love, her current love, and even more necrophilia.Listen in as me and returning guest, my almost perfect wife Ashley, reminisce over what was arguably our worst date night movie choice.Directed by Jörg Buttgereit (Nekromantik, Schramm) and co-written by Buttgereit and Franz Rodenkirchen (Nekromantik, Schramm), the Bloody Pit of Horror said the film "steers away from the grotesque gore for a more serious, though leisurely, look at necrophilia," while Tales of Terror said "it crumbles when it becomes surreal and pretentious, which it often does." I agree, though "leisurely" is a bit kind. It's slow. So. Damned. Slow...It tells the story of ...The film is currently available on DVD and Blu-Ray.

The show will continue after a brief hiatus.

A story about family, friendly competition, adult braces, and suburban hell.Listen in as me and guest, Dan, pull on our polo shirts and tighten our braces for this trippy flick.Co-written and co-directed by Jocelyn DeBoer (Adam Ruins Everything, The Arrival) and Dawn Luebbe (Adam Ruins Everything, Dress A Cow), The Globe and Mail called the film "as enticing as it is bizarre," while The New York Times said it was "excruciatingly surreal." Rawr... Looks like this is another audience-divider like Napoleon Dynamite. It tells the story of two mothers whose friendship and families begin to feel the strain of competition as Jill (DeBoer) and Lisa (Luebbe) continuously up the ante of being the better person/mother/friend/neighbor. Add in a killer on the lose, lots of mouth close ups, and a kid who turns into a dog and you get the swirling strangeness that is Greener Grass.The film is currently available on Hulu, and on DVD and Blu-Ray.

A story about a corrupt prison system, eyeball damage, crowd-provided exposition, and magically appearing items.Listen in as me and returning guest, Joe, dust off our whistle-leafs and stretch our muscles in preparation for this knock-down, head-smasher of a film.Written and directed by Ngai Choi Lam (Her Vengeance, Erotic Ghoast Story) and based on the manga "Riki-oh" by Tetsuya Saruwatari and Masahiko Takajo, Screen Anarchy said "this may be the greatest film ever made," while Cinemagazine called it "a movie with a lot of flaws." Well... Sounds like someone didn't understand just how brilliant this splatter-fu movie is!It tells the story of Riki-Oh (Siu-Wong Fan), a young man with superhuman strength and a soft spot for the weak, the lame, and the bullied. In a world where prisons have become privatized, prisoner abuse runs rampant with no system of order apart from the corrupt warden and his staff as well as a small band of gang bosses. Well, Ricky ain't gonna stand for that. Once he sees an old man beaten up, he starts to show just how dangerous he is and it isn't long before the assistant warden, Cyclops Dan (played by Siu-Wong's father, Mei Cheng Fan), initiates a plan to take Ricky out of the equation. Dismemberment, disemboweling, and cranial fractures follow.The film is currently available on Amazon Prime Video, Tubi, DVD, and Blu-ray.

A story about two warring families, two star-crossed lovers, some graphic violence, and a whole lot of boobs.Listen in as me and new guest and veteran podcaster, Julian, put in our nose piercings and prince alberts for this raucous and vulgar rendition of the Bard's most recognized work.Directed by Lloyd Kaufman (The Toxic Avenger, Sgt. Kabukiman N.Y.P.D.) and co-written by Kaufman and James Gunn (Guardians of the Galaxy, The Suicide Squad), the San Francisco Examiner said of the film that "amid the severed fingers, gouged eyes and lethal vibrators, one finds moments of genuine wit," while the AV Club said "its chief demographic [is] maladjusted 12-year-old boys." Rude. I may be maladjusted, but I am not 12-years-old.It tells the story of Romeo and Juliet, but Troma style. What's that? You didn't have to read it in high school? Oh... you didn't have to read it in home school. Gotcha. Okay, here it goes. Tromeo Que loves Juliet Capulet. Ques and Capulet hate each other more than the Hatfields and McCoys, thus one can see the problem. Throw in nightmares of a demon penis, some decapitations, and a crossbow that blows shit up and you have one helluva movie.The film is currently available on Peacock, Plex, Pluto TV, Tubi, Prime Video, and Blu-ray & DVD

A story about a poisoned water supply, insane misogynists, penis obsession, and way too much semen.***LISTENER DISCRETION IS ADVISED*** Listen in as me and guest, Chris, talk about the social commentary and startling amount of ejaculation in this fantastically over-the-top comedy-horror.Co-directed by Drew Bolduc (Science Team, Assassinaut) and Dan Nelson (The Taint), and written by Bolduc, Ain't It Cool News called the film "one of the most inanely funny films [we've] seen," while Portland Mercury said "[they] can't recommend this movie, per se, but [they] also can't stop thinking about it." If those don't get you curious, then you'll definitely need to hear this episode. This film is fucking epic and brilliant. Fight me.It tells the story of a small town whose water supply has been poisoned by the TAINT. It makes men go crazy for murder, and murder makes them orgasm like firehoses. Forced to navigate and survive in this ruthless and jizz-soaked world is Phil O'Ginny (played by filmmaker Drew Bolduc), a lazy student who cares more about getting laid and smoking cigarettes then class. He meets up with fierce Misandra (a tough-as-nails Colleen Walsh) and the two set out to learn just what happened to cause the violent mayhem around them.The film is currently available on Vimeo, TromaNOW, and Blu-ray & DVD.

A story about puppets, Thanksgiving Land, a missing movie, and a space worm.Listen in as me and returning guest, Devon, pull on our stretchy pants and sit down to feast on the sequel to the infamous ThanksKilling. We wanted a meal, but it ended up feeling like a forced enema.Directed by Jordan Downey (ThanksKilling, The Head Hunter) and co-written by Downey, Mike Will Downey (ThanksKilling 3), and Kevin Stewart (ThanksKilling, The Head Hunter), Cinema Head Cheese called the film "so incredibly bad, it defies the worst possible criticism, and ultimately, it proves absolutely zany-wonderful to behold," while Splatter Critic said it was "a general mess that rarely makes sense." I'm gonna have to side with Splatter Critic on this one. Spoiler alert: we didn't like this film. Sorry ThanksKilling crew. You did MUCH better when you had less money.It tells the story of Turkie from the first film hunting down the last copy of ThanksKilling 2, a film that was so bad every copy but one was destroyed. There are lots of puppets (for some reason) and a duo of Thanksgiving-obsessed dudes who want to make a theme park dedicated to the holiday. Confused? Well, it only goes downhill from here. Honestly, why couldn't ThanksKilling 3 meet the same fate as part 2?The film is currently available on Indie Club via Prime Video Channels, Pluto TV, Tubi, and Prime Video for rent or purchase.

Guess who is back......with a bonus episode at least! And it's SPOILER FREE!It's been since Thanksgiving that the show has dropped the freshness into your feed. Well, allow me to apologize again (new job + new baby = WTF happed to my schedule) and THANK YOU for tuning in, whether you're new to the show or a longtime subscriber.As we ramp up to bring season 3 home, we interrupt our unplanned silence with some breaking news! Neil Breen's 6th film has its premiere at the Hollywood Reel Independent Film Festival on February 25th. We were there for the magic, heard Neil answer a variety of questions, and met the man himself. His new film, Cade: The Tortured Crossing, is outrageously fun and some of Neil's best work yet.Listen in as I chat once again with our resident specialist in Breenism, Richard, about the film, Neil's creative trajectory, and of course that awesome Q&A.

A story about sex in cars, sex with scars, sex with strangers, and oh yeah... car crashes.Listen in as me and returning guest Dan buckle up and put the pedal to the metal with this car-wreck of film—in a good way!Written and directed by David Cronenberg (The Fly, A History of Violence) and based on the book by J.G. Ballard (High-Rise, Empire of the Sun), Roger Ebert called the film "pornographic in form, but not in result," while the Christian Science Monitor said it was "surprisingly dull given the story's outrageous subject." Of course you'd say that CSM...It tells the story of TV director James Ballard (played brilliantly by James Spader) and his wife, Catherine (a stunning Deborah Kara Unger), as they engage in extramarital affairs in an attempt to reignite their own sex life. One day, James gets into a serious auto accident which brings him into contact with the widow of the man he's killed and an entire subculture of auto-wreck enthusiasts. As he gets drawn into this fetishist underworld, the lines between bodies, steel, sexuality, and brutality, all become blurred.The film is currently available on Blu-Ray and DVD.

In this special bonus episode I sit down and chat with the filmmaker behind The Taint, Drew Bolduc. We chat about how he pulled off those awesomely gross and hilarious visual effects, how he got into filmmaking, and much more.Check out our conversation for a look behind the magic that is The Taint!

One is a story about doodles, 'noids, sex, and utter insanity...The other, a story about a boy, his monster friend, his unhappy parents, and some pretty horrific stuff for a kids movie.Listen in as me and returning guest Ben, step in to the mad worlds of doodles and monsters in this special bonus episode.I'm clawing my way back to the show and I hope you enjoy this double feature.